© Mohammed   15-03-2006

reporter: enters the room
reporter: Almost one o'clock – waiting - stop
Muhammed: enters the room
reporter: Aha, a new contact. I am curious. Mohammad?
Muhammed: enters the room
reporter: One a clock
Still waiting.
Don't have much time
Mohammed. Where are u? I need information.
I hate deadlines
tell me where u are, damned
Muhammed: I am back.
I thought there's only war in Irak.
Hazim didn't tell me that there can be war on the Internet.
reporter: War, wars. Clocks and time. Thats all.
Where are you? What is your age?

reporter: Muhammed? Hurry. Hurry up. Say Something

I don't care, but say something to me....

Where are you, we have an appointment. Stick to our appointment!

Do you have any idea of my workload?

Muhammed: I am very happy with this digital meeting.

reporter: Aha, finally. 30 minutes delay. Dear friend, in every job you will get reprimanded for this. But ok. There you are. Ca va. There may be other thoughts in your mind. Come on with your story!

Come on friend.

The zoo! How is it in the zoo!

Muhammed: (The electricity went down. My translation didn't !!)

reporter: ( ai, will it come back, this electricity?)

Muhammed: (Electricity is back. Baghdad is reading)
in love with theatre
in love with peace
in search for reality
thats what I am doing
even now
and I am worried for this project
I hope it will succeed
or better..
that it shall not fail

reporter: Me too! ! My deadline is at 6 pm tonight. If it keeps going so slow we better forget it. Look, thats already the first difference between me and you. Time, a deadline. No text, no food. Theater? Theater has plenty of time. That's the problem. But we'd better talk about that later. The zoo. Tell me about the zoo.

Ok, Muhammed, let's recapitulate for a second. I was there in Belgrado when the NAVO bombed the zoo and the giraffes passed along the statues of Milosevic. I ask myself - especially now Milosevic is dead - how is or was this at your place? Are there still? Animals in the zoo? And if not: where did they go? Fled or eaten?

Muhammed: Beautiful commentary, this kind of irony with regard to the dictator
with regard to the war and the unimaginable diversity of bombs, her gigantic sounds... and the way this sound is conducted into space these sounds I used to listen to as a gift of the Americans to my neighbourhood

reporter: Belgrado was not very different my dear Muhammed.
Babylon district behind the river

because of this sound
they transported
the death to the cemetery
transported the death to the cemetery
on donkeys
because nothing could move
except donkeys
and a little car
they call this area
the garbage-district
you may call the people roofless
a very poor district
this garbage-district
inspired me to perform UBU
ubu the king

Muhammed: imagine...the American bombed this dirt

reporter: So what Americans! And lets forget the zoo. I will make up my own article. I don't care. I myself never had any problem with that. By the way: I knew a guy in Belgrade who smuggled drugs and during the war he showed up as a reporter for the CNN. Can you imagine the quality of the news if illegals are involved in writing it?

reporter: Since G.W. Bush remarked that the explosion of the news on TV, but even more on the internet is a fantastic thing, it doesn't matter anymore what you say. Do you have time to read Mohammed?

Muhammed: the smell of the bombs and the shattered bodies is the sign of our postmodern age. A kind of drug for nowadays.
Talking about journalism... a kind of job where you can't find many people who do it the proper way.
In theatre its easier, in journalism you risk to offend people very quickly. Theater is different, because in theatre we're in love, and when you're in love you don't feel the need to hate or offend.
We don't need the media. In Iraq the the media needs the Iraqi. The media blackmails us, even in our most intimate stories .

reporter: The Media is a sucker - and believe me, I am the best! I suck everything till the last drip. Women, Men. Their stories, their bodies. Media is fun dear Muhammed. By the way, do you know that, due to the precise fact that there have been some wars in Europe, in the Balkan, the post modernism is completely outstripped? He who tattles about post- modernism belongs to the past. It looks as if the war in Kosovo, or the one in the Gulf if you wish, triggered something in the younger generation that goes beyond post-modernism. As if poetry in life is accepted again. Can you imagine, that they invent such a thing over here in the West? They never felt a real war, only heard about it.
Tell me, why do you play this UBU? And how does it looks like? O yes, and if you have to wait for me, this is because I am inventing a story to put on my blog, about you, the war, Milosowic and the Zoo

Muhammed: Post modernism and everything that follows in life, everything based on specific laws and conventions, all these things touch our feelings, our soul and our sentiments not.

We cant do anything else then lean on poems. Poetry is some kind of metaphysics.

reporter: You just lost me Mohammed! I don't understand a word of this. I want to underline that we here live in another mental dimension. So you look like aliens for us. As we are aliens for you I think. Get it?

Muhammed: sorry, my thoughts are messed up because the electricity broke down three times in the meantime.

reporter: No, doesn't matter Are you more an alien for you neighbours as for me? ...

Ok wait...a question. Imagine that Allah has a face and a body, and that he rang at your doorbell and he would ask you: “Hey Mohammed, come in my 4x4 and join a glass of mint-tea” . What would you tell him?

Muhammed: ...I better my neighbours...

Muhammed: I will accept the request of Allah because it will certainly have a meaning. But if this request has no meaning or mission I will not execute it, and he knows why.

reporter: Why?... explain me?

Hey Mohammed, I have to end the chat.

Shall we try a chat next Saturday together? In the meantime I give you a question to think about. "Do you know a place with absolute silence?'

Muhammed: Poets and theatrical characters often have telephonic contact with Allah. But the line has been busy. But normal people are lucky that Allah connects with them on a spiritual basis. And for this reason we approach dying with great happiness.

reporter: If there is a heaven, Mohammed, whom wouldn't you like to meet there?


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