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Monologue:
©
Rogier Schippers 1999
Rapid
Eye Movement/Part II
The
fall from a high flat.
That
are you.
And
at each store you pass you think: I'm falling quite well.
I'm
quite well at work.
A
fall can endure unending.
But
it doesn't matter how you fall.
It
matters how you come down.
And
that's me.
...
I
am the incarnate injustice.
The
complete arbitrariness.
Always
the wrong moment.
I'm
the bullets in the door of the discotheque.
The
ticket for her coat was in her hands.
Fine
hands.
Then
I'm the bullets through the door of the disco.
She
was still looking back over her shoulder.
To
see the bullet disappear in her left eye.
...
The
footprint in a neck.
That
is me.
Unpunished.
...
I
see myself again in cars,cut open, along the A16.
On
a foggy monday morning.
In
my little house in the Ardennes.
In
the cellar especially built for me.
In
the choppers - forgotten for now - in a jungle.
But
also in the forgotten time, third floor up back.
Untill
I turn into thick, black flies.
And
the people next-door are getting problems with it.
...
I
am tears.
The
turned away gaze.
The
closed eyes.
The
unborn fruit.
But
also the fried egg.
In
the morning in the pan.
Just
as easy.
...
I
have no ethics.
Piss
off, man.
That
I cann't allow myself.
Crossing
game.
That's
ethics.
...
I
am what often starts as a little lump.
The
silence when the monitor ultimately ceases.
The
last conversation, often not made.
I'm
so damned sorry.
And
tragical.
And
with great dismay.
We
will miss you.
I
am sad, but grateful.
And
yet completely unexpected.
...
I
have a vague feeling of nausea.
Those
times I am brought up for discussion.
...
I
always go alone to a party.
And
I never come home alone.
...
Take
solitude with me.
Leave
solitude behind.
...
I
am you.
I
am your neighbour.
I
am your woman next-door.
I'm
everything.
...
I
am Death
...
Yes,
I am the Death. (childlike pronounced)
...
Quite
good, eh?
...
I
am the last you will see.
Your
last experience.
And
after that there is nothing.
And
that is an understatement.
...
Because,
the illusion - and yet you'll agree with me - the illusion that after this
there would be an hereafter, or - God save the mark - even something like
Heaven, that's then something of a very infantile calibre.
A
little walking over a large meadow in white pyamas.
And
who organises it?
Every
three seconds a dead one, since the origin of mankind.
And
they all want to have a talk with Elvis Presly also.
As
if death is a free hotel where coca-cola comes out of the tap.
You
become crazy about it all.
To
say nothing of those tribes badgering the life out of me because they think
seriously they can come back as holy cow or horse or enumerate the
whole cattle population, or as any Napoleon to be born yet.
As
though it should interest me.
As
though I had time for such things.
Death
is no joke.
Piss
off, man.
Respect.
Respect
for death.
...
It
is all of such a vulgarity when I ultimately pass by.
(Woman
leaves through the public.
The
dead man remains behind.
Black-out)
"Forum"
Give your reaktion
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