The Beard of Bush 

Vladimir Markovic & Rogier Schippers 11 November 2001


vladimir: enters the room
vladimir: hello
G.W.Bush: enters the room
G.W.Bush: Hi boy
vladimir: Good evening, sir!
G.W.Bush: You saw by chance a man with a beard? It seems he is seen here on the Balkan.
vladimir: Actually, he dropped for a cup of tea to my place
G.W.Bush: Well well, I thought we cleaned up that mideaval Balkan of you, but you cant trust your own mother these days.
vladimir: he says hello
G.W.Bush: This basterd says a lot more than Hello. Here is he?!!!
vladimir: I am trying to understand his logic. You always have to do that. War is always a war of two oposite logics. but when you enter your enemy's logic, war gets irrelevant
G.W.Bush: Flying into my WTC towers, killing my civilisation with antrax, that is his logic.
We would never do such thing.
And we dont want war or violence, we just want to bomb the basterd.
Than we can return to normal life
vladimir: He's just gone from my room, so I am free to say. \, he's kinda weird, for sure. But on the other hand, how are things with your conscience standing, Mr. President? Have you or your predecessors done something wtrong recently?
G.W.Bush: I cant remember doing something wrong. And if we did something wrong,
there was always a basterd that forced us.
He just left your room??
Than you are simpathizing.
Are you muslim?
You look normal
vladimir: Why cant I be both muslim and normal at the same time? Actualy I am Christian, even supposed to become an Orthodox Christian priest one day maybe. For me it's all the same, everyone can drop for a cup of tea to my place, including you, Sir, and I can try to understand everyone's reasons. Undertsnding, it doesnt necessarily mean simpathizing. He is actualy practising "An eye for an eye" logic, for what you have done to his muslim brethren in Iraq, I guess. And what you have done there is faraway from being human
vladimir:
G.W.Bush: Thanks for your thee. adrop of milk would be nice, Igot that from Tony Blair, nice guy.
About that An eye for an eye, thats an American movie? Is it?
We gave the world law and order, that is what we stand for.
That is what we tried to bring to Iraq
vladimir: Actualy an eye for an eye is the Old Testament issue, but isnt it peculiar how fine both you and the Afghans fit into it? I mean, Old Testament regulations were given to people some 3000+ years ago, and now you have jet-planes and mobile phones in America, but you didnt show to have overcome this mental stage.
And as for Iraq, the only thing you brought there waqs a massive quantity of steel garbage, a great deal of it being radioactive
G.W.Bush: You mean thats whats happening now is a US-mistake?
vladimir: What I mean is, wouldnt you be all much happier raising your cows in Texas instead of sticking your nose to each hole in this world to see is there a way for you to make some profits there
G.W.Bush: Those muslims are just jealous about our cows.
vladimir: Or about how tall buildings you are able top build - taller than any mosque minaret built so far. But once my grandpa told me a good one: dont step on the snake, and it wont byte you. World would be much more peaceful place without your cowboy justice. And much less Bearded Guys would play their games in it with our lives. As a matter of fact, you first sponsored him and you sponsored his guys there in my neighbourhood too. On the other hand, could it be you are jealous about their greatest industry branch, that brings them $ bllions each year? You know what I am talking about, the white stuff
G.W.Bush: Makes me feel a little sad what you say...
You basterd, you know I cant teel this at home.
I cant go home whit this story.
...
I feel cant go home.
...
Can I stay here to night?
Dont get me wrong, thath you think Im gay.
You have a spare bed?
...
My God, if I stay here means that Ive got a Beard tomorrw.
...
Dont know if I can handle this.
Feel like Iam gonna cry...
G.W.Bush: (Vladimir, we have to end the chat, you have the last line)
vladimir: I guess it would be quit enough honesty from you if you would stop shaving yourself
G.W.Bush: (thanks vladimir, the chat is pretty nice, we gonna do it in about 30 minutes, I call you tomorrow, bye)

 

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